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THE EVILS OF NIGERIA’S 9TH ASSEMBLY LOOTMAKERS

NOTE: First published on July 23, 2021. The publishing date that appears on the tab is actually the date that it was uploaded on this new site. The point is that, although issues herein may still be current (depending on…), please don’t mistake this piece as current news.

This is “No Bullshitting“, by Harry Agina.

Greetings, folks!

Like many Nigerians, I lamented in 2019 the undemocratic imposition of Ahmed Lawan and Femi Gbajabiamila as leaders of Nigeria’s 9th National Assembly (9th NASS). President Mohammadu Buhari and his radical grandstanding “Area boy” character called Adams Oshiomhole broke all democratic rules to impose those men of QUESTIONABLE CHARACTER as leaders on the NASS. It was obvious to every discerning mind that they desperately wanted a “rubber-stamp” NASS that they can blackmail to endorse every anti-people and undemocratic policy of Buhari. And, that’s exactly what they got in Ahmed Lawan and Femi Gbajabiamila, meeeeeeeeen!!!

More than once, Senate President Ahmed Lawan confirmed the “rubber-stamp” position to us, when he declared that the 9th Assembly will always give Buhari what he asks for. Lawan’s disdain for Nigerians was clear when he vomited that treacherous fart at us. He gave us another exhibition of the impunity that characterizes the rulership (not leadership) style of the entire Buhari-cum-APC ruling team. A loot-maker who holds our mandate farted at us that his allegiance is to Buhari, and not us. He showed no qualms at all, as though he was addressing his slaves, with such disdainful take-it-or-leave-it attitude, meeeeeeeeeen!!!

In particular, I lamented in 2020 as I predicted that Buhari’s rubber-stamp 9th Assembly would never pass the pending Electoral Amendment Bill. Lawan knows that he would not continue to fart at us when our votes begin to count; so, he, Gbajabiamila, and their kind would do everything possible to ensure that our votes will never count. They are scared to see their slaves out of their control and their empire crumble. The 8th Assembly had already passed the Electoral Bill in 2019, and Buhari turned it down with untenable excuses. Many of us suspected, and some alleged that his real reasons were the provisions therein, which would checkmate election-rigging. We speculated that he rejected it because it would most likely ensure woeful failure of his APC party in the then impending 2019 general elections.

Also, every discerning mind discerned that Buhari would most likely be negatively affected more than anybody else in fair elections. My perception was that his disapproval rating was terribly bad, so bad that even his northern “Talakawa” masses who had been ready to kill for him to come into power in 2015, had gradually massively turned against him by 2019. I’m talking about people who had practically forced people on highways to hail Buhari with the Hausa slogan “Sai Baba” (Say Baba), and they were now renouncing him in 2019 with the derogatory slogan, “Kai Baba.”

I recall that some friends and some respondents to my blogs in 2019 and 2020 argued that my prediction was preposterous, because the 2023 general elections was still far off, and they could not believe that the 9th Assembly could come up with any reasonable excuse not to pass the Electoral Bill before then. That was naïve, I said, because everybody should know that the 9th Assembly does not give a damn about giving us “reasonable excuses” for whatever they do; all that they need is to satisfy their selfish interests. They shove any law that they want down our throats, even as we are yelling and kicking against them. In this case, their only interest is to stay in power ‘til they die. They can only do this through rigging because Nigerians will never vote for their looting asses once our votes begin to count. So, the loot-makers have the evil self-preservation reason to refuse to pass a good electoral law that would stop or curtail rigging.

Guess what; a couple of friends actually took a wager with me in 2020 when I made that prediction, and one of them called me yesterday to collect. “The Senate did pass the bill on July 15”, he teased, quite aware that his winning is not quite clean. He actually confessed that “the bill is as good as NOT PASSED at all…but, I still won the bet, bro”, he concluded, giggling mischievously. The dude was right; the wager in 2020 should have added a clause that an Electoral Act that does not curb rigging is the same as not passing the bill at all. The NASS leadership grudgingly bowed to the mounting pressure from Nigerians and passed the bill. But they still ensured that their rigging elements are retained. Primarily, e-transmission of results would checkmate tampering with the results between the voting booths and the final destinations where results are announced. The 9th Assembly leaders and their cohorts on the floor rejected it because it would mean an end to their evil rigging and careers as so-called lawmakers, meeeeeeeeen!!!

In one of my 2020 blogs on this, I also posited that all the loot-makers or legisla-thieves of Nigeria’s “Fourth Republic” so far (1999 ’til date), CAN BE ARGUED to be “indirect murderers”, BY OMISSION. Once you give it some thought, my reasoning for this makes sense, thus: (1) Since the onset of this “Fourth Republic” demo-crazy dispensation of Nigeria, scores of Nigerians are murdered during major elections, through rigging thuggery. (2) It is very easy to make laws to end rigging and its attendant murders. (3) So, the treacherous refusal of the loot-makers to give the nation an Electoral Act that would stop rigging, can be argued to make them indirect-murderers, by omission…QED! And, if we can’t legally prove this due to compromised court, we sure can easily win in the public court of morality and conscience.

The 9th NASS leadership and their cohorts on the floor who rejected e-transmission obviously don’t give a hoot that scores of Nigerians will be murdered again in 2023 through result-sheets snatching, which e-transmission would have stopped. Surely, there are some relatively clean loot-makers such as the Minority Leader, Enyinnaya Abaribe, but they are too small in number to influence good decisions. Besides, even when issues are voted on and the good ones carry the vote, Senate President Lawan and the House Speaker Gbajabiamila thwart the votes in favor of their pre-arranged anti-people choices. Repeatedly, we heard rulings on voice votes, which were clearly in disagreement with the actual voices that we heard in the voting. Gbajabiamila and Lawan don’t even bother to consider the fact that their rulings against the choices of the floor members are so obvious. Their interest is always the pre-determined or pre-arranged ruling of NASS leadership, or, as declared by Lawan more than once, the interest of President Buhari on whatever the matter is, meeeeeeen!!!

Folks, here’s food for thought, in case it has never occurred to you: Nigerians will most likely not vote much for APC in 2023 because of Buhari’s poor performance, his government’s lawlessness, and his anti-people policies. So, politicians should be running away from APC; right? But, it’s the other way round, they are running into APC. Why? The answer is easy to speculate, thus: It is apparent to the governors and other ‘carpet-crossers’ that APC has no intention to allow votes to count in 2023. So, being self-serving motherfuckers, they are all moving to APC to benefit from its rigging plot. If you don’t believe me, then why else would any sane person join an obviously unpopular party that is bound to fail woefully if free and fair elections are held, huh?

Let’s look at the stupid excuse that the rigging loot-makers have come up with for their rejection of e-transmission of election results. The excuse exposes them for the idiots that they SEEM to be sometimes, but they disdainfully talk to us as if we are the idiots, meeeen! Their idiotic excuse is that Nigeria has no communication infrastructure for e-transmission in some locations in Nigeria. The Senate invited their conniving leaders of Nigeria Communications Commission (NCC) to lie their motherfucking brains out, while on oath. The NCC had testified in 2018 that Nigerian communications infrastructure covered over 85 percent of Nigeria.

Three years later in this 2021, we should be closer to 100 percent coverage. Instead, the same conniving NCC crooks brought the coverage down to just above 50 percent coverage when the lootmakers APPARENTLY asked them to lie on July 14, 2021. This means that we are retrogressing while the rest of the world is progressing. Here are some facts that make the loot-makers’ excuse and lies so idiotic:

(1) For a start, the lootmakers have effectively indicted themselves that they are not performing their oversight functions. They should ensure that our telecommunication providers upgrade and give Nigerians VALUE FOR THE EXOBITANT COSTS that they pay for their services in telephony and others, but they are too compromised to do so.

(2) The election umpire, INEC has declared at every opportunity, that it has both the capacity and capability for e-transmission. Some Heads of Loot-makers had told us before the passage of the bill that they invited NCC and INEC for conversation; kaji kwo? Folks, I’ve got to tell ya, it’s a huge lie, meeen! I am very proud of Nick Dazang, the man who, with this information on this morning of July 23, 2021, inspired me to write this piece. I watched Nick on AIT’s Kakaaki Morning Show, about 8am Nigerian time. He is INEC’s Director of Public Information, and he is now a ‘No Bullshitting’ hero because he spoke in no-bullshitting unequivocal terms to the loot-makers. Naturally, I am primarily very proud of the INEC boss, Mamood Yakubu, who sent the eloquent Dazang on that patriotic mission on AIT to inform Nigerians of INEC’s stand.

My new buddy, Dazang, was VISIBLY disappointed with the loot-makers for lying to Nigerians that they invited INEC for a meeting along with NCC. He was even more disappointed about the loot-makers “unpatriotic” claim that INEC cannot transmit results electronically. “We’re already doing it, but not backed by the law yet”, he said in his own longer words. Citing the 2020 Ondo and Edo governorship elections, among others, he reaffirmed that INEC has the capacity and capability for e-transmission of results, period! The technological bandwidth requirement to transmit results is the same as what you and I need for our GSM phone calls and messaging, and services such as Point-Of-Sell (POS) transactions that pervade the nation today. INEC simply snaps photos of result sheets and sends them to servers, just as we do every fucking day with our phone cameras via whatsapp and twitter. In fact, INEC’s gadget is more powerful than phones; and, if not, then they should and can easily upgrade, meeeeeee!!!

Folks, what I want to underscore here is that the lying loot-makers only invited NCC leadership who are in cahoots with them to sabotage Nigeria! They are too dumb and too sinful to give us good laws, but they want to incompetently teach INEC its own job. They APPARENTLY connived with, or bought NCC to lie and reverse their own pronouncements of three years ago.

(3) Besides, and this is very instructive, it is not really such a big deal if some voting locations happen not to have network coverage at the time of voting. All that INEC has to do is to input the election results into the transmission gadgets. And, as soon as the gadgets are moved back to INEC’s offices with network coverage, all the information that were inputted into the gadgets would rapidly transmit to the server. The same thing happens on our personal GSM phones when we send text to people when we are in low or bad network locations.

(4) It is very laughable that the loot-makers approved the use of electronic card-readers and e-voting, but they argued that there is no infrastructure for e-transmission of votes. What a mischievous contradiction! E-transmission and e-voting use exact same fucking infrastructural capacity, folks! So, it is very clear that our loot-makers’ leadership are either too fucking dumb to be lawmakers, if they can’t understand this fact; or, they are too sinful to be there, if they think that we don’t know that they are talking nonsense. My new NB buddy, INEC’s Nick Dazang, actually sneered at the loot-makers when he addressed this point.

(5) Now, even if indeed it was true that Nigeria’s infrastructure is still too substandard for electronic transmission, then, it is high fucking time that the nation did the right thing and put the system right, meeen!!! This brings me to the fact that those loot-makers don’t ever give a fuck about how much funds that Nigeria wastes due to their evil bid to continue rigging elections. It’s A FACT that A FRACTION of the funds that are wasted on security and logistics for just one general elections alone, can easily fund all the infrastructural enhancements that are required to get our communications network in great condition for 21st century electoral system. This would stop all the waste of funds in future elections.

My point is that the motherfucking loot-makers are supposed to give us 21st century electoral law, and influence the Executive Branch to upgrade our system to meet the requirement. Instead, they choose to unconstitutionally meddle in the constitutional job of INEC, where they have no power. They have no power whatsoever to subject INEC to get approval for e-transmission from the NCC or the lootmakers themselves, or anybody else for that matter. If, and when their new law gets tested in any uncompromised court, it would fall flat on its face, voided.

Guess what? I wanno sign off with the statement that I have not even thrown in the towel in my prediction that our Electoral Act will not be ready for the 2023 elections even in its present criminal state. The loot-makers have deliberately delayed it dangerously too close to the elections, and, they have gone on another undeserved long vacation without resolving some harmonization issues. And, remember that Buhari still has to make his own input. Before you know it, 2023 will be here, and he may reject it again for being too close to the elections, to another rigging benefit of APC. It’s all plotted that way by the loot-makers…and I believe that you know, that I ain’t bullshitting ya, meeeeeeeeen!!!

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