NOLLYWOOD MOVIE MARKETING PITCHES ON THE NET

March 25, 2022

This is “No Bullshiting,” by Harry Agina.

I feel like talking about something that is light today. You know, taking a break from the tense matters of the state of the Nigerian nation, and her evil politics. It is actually easy for my new teaming readers around the world to believe that “No Bullshiting Blog” (NBB) is only about politics. Nigeria’s politics and political leadership do dominate my blogs, meeeeeeeeen!!!

But, nope, NBB is beyond politics. And, it’s definitely not a news blog either. It is a Social Critique, and it is a Variety Blog. This means that NBB critiques all sectors or sections of the society. Indeed, we cover any and everything under the sun, which catches our fancy at the given time. However, the NBB commentaries tend to be dominated by politics and political leadership in Nigeria, due to the rot therein. Generally, the blog is not necessarily limited in geographical scope, but we do have more focus on contents out of Africa, Nigeria in particular. For comprehensive information on the inception, the character, and the focus of NBB, please follow this link to visit our “About Us” page: https://nobullshiting.com/about-us/

Anyway, I decided to ‘pick on’ the people who write the marketing pitches for the Nigeria Nollywood movies that I see on YouTube these days. Whoever they are, they should be ashamed of themselves. They need to desist from their stupid fraudulent game in titling and pitching their movies. In fact, their fraudulent marketing pitches have turned me off Nollywood movies whenever I visit YouTube for movies. I mean, why the fuck should I bother, huh? I choose movies based on the titles or/and marketing pitches. They give me a little idea what each movie is all about, to decide whether or not to watch it. Why should I bother choosing Nigerian movies, now that I know that the titles and marketing pitches are fraudulent? I watch a Nollywood movie from the beginning to the end, and then I ask myself; what kind of fucking fraud is this, huh? What the fuck has this story got to do with the title and marketing pitch that got my interest in the movie, huh? Nothing, meeeeeeen!!!

I speak of dimwitted fraudulent sensationalism to sell rubbish in the name of movies. In some cases, maybe the movies are not necessarily rubbish, but it is clear that the marketing pitches are deceitful. The contents do not measure up to the sensationalism in the marketing pitches. In fact, in some cases, the marketing pitches ain’t got anything to do with the contents at all…absolutely misleading! Mind you, an honest marketer who knows the art, can actually construct titles and pitches that attract audiences without lying about the content, meeeeeeen!!!

If you know NBB, then you know that we don’t address any subject without substantiating our claims. I will end this with the marketing pitch for a sample Nigerian movie on YouTube. Honestly, this was a random pick. It was the very first movie that I got to, as I visited YouTube for this sample to present here. This is to say that one does not have to look hard or long for the fraud that I am talking about. The fraud is abundant as soon as you get to a collection of Nigerian movies on YouTube, and the internet in general. If you watch a hundred Nigerian Nollywood movies on the net, I guarantee you that over 90 of them have this fraudulent marketing sensationalism, meeeeeen!!!

My sample movie’s pitch says, “How A Rich Female C.E.O Fell In Love With Her Company New Gateman.” What you will find in the movie is light years far from what this pitch says. I do have the YouTube link to the movie shortly, so that you may confirm this ugly fact. The movie is centered on three young ladies, who are sharing an apartment in Lagos, Nigeria. They have their separate individual livelihood and lifestyles. And then, comes from the village, a very unusual, very illiterate younger sister of one of the ladies to join them. Actually, I like the humor that this ignorant young lady brings into the story. Any artistic producer or marketer can easily construct a good marketing pitch out of the illiterate’s comic relief or humor. Instead, some motherfucking dimwits came up with some nonsensical pitch. The fraudulent sensational bullshit has absolutely no connection with the content of the movie, at all. And, that’s a whole lot of bullshiting, meeeeeeeeeen!!!

Here’s the movie link: https://youtu.be/wJSSxuigPTQ

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