ONCE UPON A TIME, THERE WAS A COUNTRY CALLED NIGERIA

NOTE: First published on May 12, 2021. The “Published” date on the tab is the date that it was uploaded on this new site. Though some issues in this piece may still be current (depending on…), this is to avoid mistaking it as current news.

This is “No Bullshiting”, by Harry Agina.

Greetings, folk!

Folks, I know that an overwhelming majority of Nigerians are in agony and feel shitty about the LATE Nigeria, but I can tell ya, I feel shittier about it than everybody else. As a late literary giant, Chinua Achebe, once said it in his own style, once upon a time, “There was a country” called Nigeria!!! Now, I weep, because that country is dead. Alas, what we currently have is a Fulani Republic, which is sliding fast down the valley of total death, too. Everybody in the entire world knows this to be an ABSOLUTE FACT, hence, there is no need to expatiate on it here, meeeeeeeen!!!

You know, if I said it once, a said it a gazillion times, that I don’t really give a damn about who rules Nigeria, as long as the ‘ruling’ is good. It’s okay by me even if a non-human species, like a dog, is our president, as long as the dog is running the country well and everything is great. I am Igbo, but I don’t give a fuck if no Igbo person ever becomes the president of Nigeria, as long as whoever that is president (Hausa, Yoruba, Efik, Edo, or whoever) is doing a great job of it. All I want is a progressive Nigeria, with fairness and equity for all…no ethno-religious clannishness or nepotism, and no bigotry. After all, when Goodluck Jonathan was president; what did he do for the south? Nothing, that’s what! Indeed, what have the Fulanis who have been ruling all this long done for their “ORDINARY” Fulani and Hausa masses? Nothing, that’s what!! Hausa/Fulani masses are still the poorest in Nigeria. And, what have all my Igbo governors of the Igbo states done for me lately, huh, huh, huh??? Nothing, that’s what!!! Their interests are to sell out their own Igbo people, steal our treasury dry, lick the boots of whoever has the presidency in order to be rewarded with self-serving powers.

The motherfuckers called governors of Igbo states finally showed interest in the massacre of Igbos by Fulani jihadists who are called herdsmen, only because their own lives are now threatened, too. They didn’t give a damn when they thought that only the “ORDINARY” Igbos would continue to be massacred. But, as soon as they realized that their families and they are no longer safe under the ‘protection’ of few police officers around them, they quickly decided to initiate “Ebubeagu” security outfit, which they should have done long ago as soon as the southwest “Amotenkun” security outfit was formed…evil selfishness, I say!!! I bet you that, if only one of the motherfucking Igbo governors would be kidnapped and tortured (not killed, just tortured badly to feel pain) as the “ORDINARY” unprotected Nigerians have been tortured, they would really, totally, quickly wake up to their security responsibility.

Insecurity is so bad in our Fulani Republic now,  that the house of President Buhari’s Chief Of Staff, Ibraihim Gambari, was attacked recently, WITHIN THE SAFEST PREMISES IN NIGERIA—the “Aso-Rock Villa” complex, with its ‘Iron-clad’ security. And, Garba Shehu fed us the usual propaganda lies and deceit of his government. He said that the attack was a “mere foolish attempt” to burgle Gambari’s house, or some bullshit like that. Such are the lies that they tell just to pretend that Buhari’s Nigeria is not really bad…in the face of a horrific terrorist siege, meeeeeeeeeen!!!

So, anyway, my problem with the current Fulani Republic that we call Nigeria is NOT that Fulanis are running it, no sir, no ma’am…I love GOOD Fulani people!!! My problem is that we have a BAD Fulani absentee president, and a team of BAD de-facto or proxy Fulani presidents who seem only interested in looting, Fulanizing, and destroying Nigeria. Their mouthpieces, led by Liar Mohammed, Femi Adesina, and Garba Shehu, are truly the bomb! Garba’s indiscipline has rapidly gone from BAD to WORST, without even hesitating at the mid-point gradation of WORSE…from bad straight to worst, meeeeen!!!

What makes these terrible propagandists so annoying or provocative is their cloak and character/attitude of military dictators, in a so-called democracy. They consistently talk down on and insult Nigerians like a conquered people, with utmost impunity. In the most recent of Garba’s gazillion vomits, he told us that “all those who are calling for National Conference (to discuss equity and fairness in the country), and those who are calling for secession, are enemies of Nigeria.” The motherfucker crowned his vomit by saying to us, with utmost impunity, that “Buhari cannot be intimidated” to do the right thing of returning us from their unconstitutional Fulani Republic to the Nigeria Republic that we all signed for and agreed upon. They turned Nigeria into their private Fulani Republic, and have the audacity to brand us “the enemies of Nigeria” for agitating for the right Nigeria. Garba literally endorsed what his CONFESSED jihadists boldly tell us every day, that we have to take whatever rubbish that they dish out to us and shut the fuck up, because we are their conquered slaves, and this is no longer a democracy. Un-fucking-believable, meeeeeeeeeen!!!

Everything that I said so far is only a preamble to the short but key point of this blog. So, here comes the real McCoy: Garba, Adesina, Liar Mohammed, and their kinds talk down on us with such insulting impunity because their Commander-In-Chief, General Buhari, is in command of the armed forces. They count on their control of the armed forces to crush various segments of Nigerians who legitimately agitate for good democratic governance of fairness and equity. This fact was proven during the 2020 EndSARS protest, when they did not hesitate to massacre some peaceful protesters. They first sent thugs to disrupt the protest with mayhem, in order to give it a bad name to justify the massacre of innocent peaceful protesters.

Sure, the Fulani Republic government has been smart to put Fulani persons IN COMMAND OF ALL THE ARMED FORCES, OBVIOUSLY in preparation for the Fulanization agenda. But somebody should remind Garba and company that the armed forces have diverse ethno-religious Nigerians, and, there is something called MUTINY in armed forces, where officers revolt against their commanders who command them to do the unthinkable. They fail to understand that Generals don’t do the actual fighting in wars; their “footsoldiers” do. And, there may come a time, soon, when the non-Fulani footsoldiers of the armed forces will revolt against their Fulani Generals and commanders, if the commanders send them to massacre their own people to suppress legitimate agitations for fairness and equity.

But, you see, I blame the entire Nigerians for subserviently accepting the Fulanization for too long already, which has emboldened Garba Shehu, Liar Mohammed, and their kinds to grow so much wings of impunity. Garba’s recent vomit smacks of absolute lack of intelligence. If he had any atom of intelligence, he would at least know that OPPOSITION, PROTESTS, and DISSENTING VOICES are among the bedrock of DEMOCRACY all over the world. If he had any intelligence, he would at least endeavor to pursue his PROPAGANDA for Buhari’s de facto presidents’ unbelievable clannish misrule with a little diplomacy that would not provoke Nigerians so badly. If he was not so dumb he would know that, all over the world, sane persons NEVER EVER refer to opposition parties and other dissenting voices as enemies of the state, because they are part and parcel of the game of democracy, meeeeen!!!

I am especially disappointed that some Nigerians who have condemned Garba Shehu for his vomits have not dared to give him the kind of insult and harsh words that befit the CONDESCENDING attitude and INSULTING WORDS that he pours on Nigerians in his dictatorial comments. Everybody is still playing the nonsensical POLITICALLY-CORRECT NICENESS in their words and attitudes. And this means that Garba may never understand how angry Nigerians are about his vomits. So, NBB comes to the rescue, giving it to him as he deserves, on behalf of the real MAJORITY TRUE NIGERIANS out there who are called “ordinary.” The anger of the so-called “ordinary” Nigerians is never well represented by  their so-called opinion leaders and spokespersons with their bullshitting, fucked-up politically-correct NICE speeches. We have Garba talking down on us like a maximum ruler, IN A DEMOCRACY, and our so-called opinion leaders are ANNOYINGLY NICE as they respond to him, meeeeeeeen!!!

I am aware that the courageous Charlyboy Oputa, “The Area Fada,” reads my blogs, and so, I hereby call upon him to speak out in his customary bold manner, and mobilize his kind of true Nigerians in the media and/or Civil Society to speak out loudly against the insults to Nigerians by Garba Shehu, LIAR Mohammed, Femi Adesina, and their kinds. I have not heard Femi lately, and I pray that he has learned how terrible it has been that a non-Fulani man like him has been supporting a Fulanization jihad in Nigeria, for the reason of dirty power and money. If he has learned to behave right and avoid his hitherto condescending comments against Nigerians in his propaganda hatchet job for the Fulani Republic, then I HAIL HIM with the same spirit of love that I always hail and welcome back “prodigal sons.”

As customary with Harry Agina and my NBB alter-ego, I wanno end this with my regular words of caution, thus: Please AVOID STEREOTYPING as you talk about the obvious Fulanization agenda. Always remember that MAJORITY of members of the Nigerian Fulani race are great people, and not all jihadists. I know that I am now “sounding like a broken vinyl record plate,” but, yes, I have indeed listened to many Fulani friends and acquaintances who bitterly condemn Buhari’s Fulanization agenda that has encourage the current jihad by some evil Fulanis. The common reason for the anger of the good Fulanis is that Buhari has brought global hatred upon the entire Fulani race. So, in your criticisms, be nice to the good people of the Fulani race by avoiding categorical stereotypical statements. I continue to trust that you know that I ain’t bullshitting ya, meeeeeeeen!!!

NBB INFOTAINMENT: “CHANT DOWN BABYLON”:

You do know that the tools of peaceful revolutions include the press, as the NBB has been doing, and music, such as the following song by the Jamaican Band named “Culture,” which is titled “Chant Down Babylon.” In Jamaican lingo, “Babylon” stands for the “Establishment” or the government, especially one that is bad and oppressive to the people. Do I need to say more about how this music relates to my topic of the day—the oppressive Fulani Republic—huh? Without much ado, I employ “Culture” Band of Jamaica to help us in “chanting down the “Babylon” (or the “Establishment”) in Nigeria, “with their wickedness” and “their abominable words and work,” thus: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ek5tr50Ji8

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